By: Komaljeet Kaur, Justice Studies Major and Psychology Minor
Emotional abuse is a notorious crime that breaks down a person and changes their life, yet leaves no evidence. Those who master the art of inflicting mental pain acquire complete power over an individual. When looking at the effects of emotional abuse, it is astonishing how much harm the mind and emotions can cause. There is no need to buy weapons to destroy people, we are born with “natural guns” (minds) and “ammunition” (emotions) to take “life” (spirit to live).
There is no physical evidence of emotional abuse, which is the beauty of the crime. There are only emotional symptoms, but in society who cares about feelings or emotions we want evidence! Shattered self-esteem, a broken heart, and an impaired sense of self value; are not going to win a trial against an evidence driven jury. If scars are not physically present, you have no case and therefore no punishment. Sadly enough the reality is that a broken heart or emotional abuse can not be seen, only felt.
It is quite interesting to examine the role emotions play in relationships. Emotions unite individuals, but the connection may be used destructively or productively depending on his or her subconscious agenda. Emotional abuse often occurs when one individual is trying to build emotional intimacy, while the other is using emotions to establish power and control. This is the point in a relationship when one partner becomes an abuser and the other a victim.
During the emotional abuse the victim is constantly experiencing painful feelings associated with emotional abuse; these feelings negatively impact their life and influence their future. The scars from inflicted wounds fade but the feelings, emotions, and memories are forever engraved in the mind.
Even after an emotionally abusive relationship ends the victim has to live with the side effects. While some individuals fall into a cycle of emotionally abusive relationships, others realize they need to make a change and are in search of a psychologist or good friend to heal them from the emotional trauma they have endured.
It is essential for friends and family members to support individuals that are recovering from an emotionally abusive relationships. The victim needs help unloading the emotional baggage that he or she has acquired from the abusive relationship. If the victim is not: listened to, understood, and supported they become a walking bag of emotions. When the bag reaches its’ capacity it will either burst into flames or the emotions will overflow and spill across the floor splashing everyone they comes in contact with. Emotions are like powerful waterfalls just looking for a river that will lead them to the ocean.
Before the weight of emotional luggage tips a friend over, grab a seat and help them unload. Even the simple act of listening can decrease the powerful currents of a waterfall and help the waves peacefully reach their destination. . .
Komaljeet recently started her own blog on social justice and change. Check it out here: http://intellectualsunited.